Thursday, February 2, 2012

Snowfest Blogfest

Today is Roh Morgan's Snowfest Blogfest. 

Return HERE for the list of participants.

The object of the blogfest was to create a scene in the snow. My entry comes in at 745 words and is taken from my fantasy manuscript, Bond of Darkness.

Before I post, I again will shamelessly plug my blogfest, occurring on February 13th, right here at In My Write Mind. Click HERE to visit the sign up sheet.

Now, for my entry:


“To Aldholt!” Alpha roared, his voice the likeness of Lemmick Soluth. “Across the stars and space, to the eternal winter’s birth place.”
    
We stepped back and the tether wrapped around us. I watched our bodies disintegrate into the cosmic energy of the tether and then there was blackness. My senses tumbled all over the place. Those Mavians were dead now, for the magic expelled by traveling through a tether was lethal to those around it. I felt time spin around me, the threads of space we sped along like an endless spiral.
    
There were no stars, no planes or suns I could see. When we landed, Aldholt’s wintery gusts was a strong slap in the face that I felt all the way in my bones. The five of us were knee deep in white powder, hills of snow spraying clouds around and over us. I looked around, feeling suddenly alone. I knew what kind of people lived here and for once, I felt truly frightened and hopeless. I wrapped my cloak around my shoulders, but it did little to protect me. I waded up the first hill, my feet dragging as if I was fighting a current in a powerful river. When I made it to the top, my hand crested on my brow, I looked upon the gleaming silver and gold city of the Mavians. Even from here, from the farthest I could see on both my left and right appeared treacherous. Ugly, twisted spires vanished into the blustery snow drifts, each aglow with hazy oranges and yellows. That’s all I saw. The ramparts, gargantuan beveled walls with curved blades sticking up from them, were iced over and gleaming in the light.
   
I glanced up and witnessed the alien nature of this plane. It had never been determined just how far the other planes were from Elyserian, but one thing was certain: on Elyserian, we did not have two suns. Here, one was tucked in the distance far behind the city, and the other was at our backs.
    
Melana came next to me with the others. She grabbed my arm, saying, “That place looks awful.”
    
“And we have to go into its heart,” I said.
    
No sooner had I spoken, sharp sounds like trumpet horns cut through the air. They came from the city. Except they were not trumpets. They were sirens. I looked back at my friends, wondering if they ever suspected this would happen.
    
“He knows we’re here,” I said. “We have to move.” 

We ran as fast as we could through the snow, trying to get away from the city. Despite our best efforts, it was too dense and cold for us to flee. I glanced back at Alpha as we trudged through the powder.
    
“Lose the shape,” I ordered. Alpha assumed his own form again and I instantly felt the magic leave him. I dampened my own channel with a weave I had learned in my studies, hoping it would throw Irien off our track.
    
I took us an easy left over a steep hill, not knowing where it led nor knowing how steep actually was. I made it three steps down before losing my feet and tumbling head over heels to the bottom. The others had no better progress, but managed to fall down more gracefully than me. With a face dusted white and my eyes filled with snow, I tried pulling my cloak more tightly. Snow filled my hood and around my neck where it clasped, making it no more comfortable. The longer the sirens blared, the quicker my hope diminished of us hiding our tracks. Just then, they cut off. The ringing still hung in the air for a moment, but was soon taken over by the howling gusts. I didn’t know what happened. Did we truly escape? With all the technology the Mavians had at their hands, I was sure they would have been able to find us, even being this far out from the city.
    
“Val—” Melana said, my name stuttering off. I turned to her. She had fallen in the snow, curled up. Alanur was behind her, doubling her warmth by wrapping his fur cloak over her shoulders. I’d have done the same, but Alanur wore no sleeves. I helped her stand and brought her close, looking at Alanur over her shoulder. His eyes were hard on mine, slightly narrowed as if asking me what we were to do next.

7 comments:

  1. Good post. You did a good job of making us feel the snow and our surroundings.

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  2. Wish I had known about this blogfest earlier. Great post. :)

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  3. I love the other-wordly feel of this right from the get-go. Names like 'Alholt' and 'Lemmick Soluth' immediately told us we were not on present-day Earth.

    The description of their travel was really cool, too, as were the rest of the visuals. I had no trouble seeing this snowbound world with two suns.

    And I definitely felt the cold snow caked around my neck after the tumble down the hill.

    Nice work.

    Thanks for participating in the *Snowfest* Blogfest. I'm off to go sign up for your Hook, Line, and Sinker blogfest!

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  4. Ooh I could feel the snow melting on my own neck. This is very interesting. I'd of kept reading and enjoying and really, that's the writers goal eh?

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  5. BTW the first two paragraphs nearly jerked me out of my seat. I'd like to more about what a tether is and what these...people?... are.

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  6. Awesome action scene JW. Your world building skills are as accute as I remember. This gripped me and kept me engaged.

    I hope you are still working on this novel; or querying it. I'm embarrassed to admit last time I was by here you were frustrated and talking of trashing it. I've enjoyed reading all the exceerpts you've posted.

    ......dhole

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    Replies
    1. I've actually conceived a whole new plot, Donna. I trunked it for a while, played around with another idea for a ms, then came back to BoD.

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